#14: Friends with Benefits: Well, that’s the end of that.

Well, talk about a 180. I am 99% sure I am ending things with John Boy tomorrow. It’s been two weeks and I’ve barely heard from him, I haven’t seen him and he cancelled a date on me without offering up any reason. I thought I had my expectations in check, but I didn’t. He’s hurt my feelings too many times and I even cried about it this week. Not the experience I was looking for, and definitely not something I need to continue. Self-respect is finally kicking in. If I lived in a bigger town with more options I would have ended this earlier, I like to tell myself that anyway.

I’m disappointed. Extremely disappointed. I thought I had at least 3 more months of great sex and cuddling. He was almost perfect. When I started this big social experiment all I wanted was a nice, sexy man who could make me cum. Even though we had great sex, he never made me cum. In fact, I don’t think he has even gone down on me since I’ve been back in town and he started living here. Huh. That’s strange. He keeps telling me how nice I am, I wonder if that means that he is not. I guess its back to the drawing board.

I did read an article about friends with benefits today and it stated that a larger percentage of men develop feelings for their partners than women do. Shocking. And officially my self-esteem is in the toilet. I’ll wait to hear from him first then probably end it over text. I am not anticipating much of a fight.

The good news is, I had an STD Screening and everything came back negative. so, I’ve got that going for me, which is nice.

I’ll update as soon as it’s done.

So sad.

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